I dont know where to go from here...

i wanted to run, to scream, to say i was angry and not lie. I wasnt sure of my emotional ability at that moment, so i chose to breathe, smile, and hold my head high. honestly that day was a blurr of laughs, pleads, anger, and most of all confusion down to my soul, the day your lies became the truth & everything right took control.

till this day you'll think of what you did wrong, you'll put your heart into a selfish asperation and hold on till you get what you want and then its "so long". so the day the girl you could only dreamed of having decided to do something for her, it was "baby please dont go, listen to me, wait" but honey i concur. For every moment you said what you would do if i cheated, lied, or ran from the truth, there was something you left hidden, something that could leave another so incredibly bruised. But you got me, and my heart is stronger that you ever gave me credit for, i told you not to underestimate my mind, power, and soul, but you just had to test me with all your whores. thanks for the advice, all those times you told me exactly what you would do if i cheated, lied, or was untrue.... in the end they were what made me realize exactly what i deserved and what i should do.

the day you look into my eyes & i trust you again, you'll know.
there will be no doubt in your mind that i do...
until then please don't ask me if i have that trust yet
because it destroys me to have to look into your eyes and tell you the truth

i wanna believe you when you say you have "no doubt"
that you wanna hold me forever & have no other girl around
i wanna know that i trust you, just like i know you're all i'll ever need
but i know that im not worthy of your happiness & that i'm not much to see
i wanna have that "no doubt" feeling, just like you say you do
but how is that going to happen... when i'm trying so hard to convince myself you're speaking the truth.

take me back to crossed fingers, pinky promises, & clicking my heels to take me home
bring me to the days where scouts honor meant no "take backs"
which assured me that i would never have to feel alone.
where a promise was a promise
& they were never broken between friends
take me to the days where forever meant it would never end
let me arrive upon innocent kisses, truths, & seldom lies
where the love of your life only said he loved you when he could cross his heart and hope to die.

i asked him... "what's the first thing you notice about other girls"
he told me... "that they're not you"
(god i want that) (not mine...but its cute)

A girl should have two things: a smile and a guy who inspires it.

I have told every guy in my past not to fall for a girl like me.
because my hearts the best but my mind destroys me.

I ruin everything they will want to have in me.;I warn them so they won't get mad.

now it's time once again
i'm staring at reflections of what i have once done

& every bridge I ever built, every wall i ever pilled, they will burn & tumble because another guy wants to prove me wrong, I guess its time I learned how to swim, so here i go... push me in.


every time that boy stares into my eyes i have to wonder
wonder if he sees the girl i have always been
or the one he has always wanted me to be...
i wonder if he sees me or the girl he wants me to be... more like her.

when he called me up, out of the blue, i knew he thought he was talking to the girl i used to be when i was with him
because when i laughed, i could tell he was smiling - when i mentioned an inside joke, i could hear him sigh - so when i told him he was a mere memory, it wasn't surprising to hear how his voice cracked when he said goodbye.

I'm an easy girl to love, but the hardest girl to keep loving.

isn't it ironic that in life the person that brings out the best in you and the one that makes you strong... is actually your weakness?

Reach for the stars, stand on your tiptoes, and never tell yourself no. You, yes you, can achieve anything. It may take months, it may take years, but when you finally have a firm grasp on a star, the reward is breathtaking.

That's the problem with us, we're too much alike. We're stubborn asses and always want to get our own way. We both hate to be wrong and love to be right. But that's the thing about love, no matter what happens, we always come back for each other one more time.

He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had.
Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.

Have you ever wondered about the things we tell ourselves before we fall asleep? We whisper the words in the dark, telling ourselves that we're happy, or that he's happy, that people will change their minds. We persuade ourselves that we can live without the people who have left. Each night before we fall asleep we lie to ourselves in a desperate hope that come morning, it will all be true.

If I could explain love in one word, it would have to be trust. Trust that he doesn’t cheat on you, trust that he doesn’t lie to you, trust that he really likes you, trust that he will always be there for you, trust that he can go to a party and not get high or drunk, trust that you don’t have to worry about him breaking up with you the second you wake up, trust that he will stick up for you, trust that he will never fall in love with another girl, trust that he won’t just get sick of you, and trust that he wants you like you want him.

I spend 23 hours a day wondering whether we're wrong for each other, wondering whether we've got the energy that we need to get through everything that we seem to get into, whether the baggage we both bring would sink a small ship. But in the 24th hour, I realize I've been thinking about him for 23 hours and I come back to, there's something about him I can't stay away from. Something that makes me want to love him.

You're right. I've never had a bad break up. I've never had my heart broken into a million pieces. I have no right to put up these walls, right? But I have seen my friends cry for months over boys who they gave their hearts to. I've seen boys promise 'forever' only to watch forever end a few months later, when they find someone better to sleep with. I've stayed up countless nights, not by choice, but because my parents were fighting so loud that I couldn't fall asleep. I've been the shoulder to cry on. I've seen the strongest people in the world become weak for love. And I refuse to be that girl. I will never fall in love.

I really enjoy spending time with you, even if we're just going to be sitting around and talking about nothing. There are a million things I love about you, like your nose or the way you smile, the way you look me in the eye too. And I just get the greatest feeling when I make you laugh, I feel as if my company makes you happy, and that's what I wish for you. For you to be happy. And when I see you laugh at my clumsy ways, it just makes me want to spend the rest of my life with you so I can see a smile on your face.

You can be minutes away or in another country, the feelings I have for you won't stop. Even if I haven't seen you in a while, I still have the feeling of your lips against mine. I can still make a visual image of you smiling and being close to me. If only I could sleep through the days till I see you again.

you're always on my mind..but sometimes i feel like I'm only a passing thought

I think I saw you in my sleep, darling. I think I saw you in my dreams, you were stitching up the seams on every broken promise that your body couldn't keep.

Love is a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughs and perfect moments that you find only in movies. You expect him to always say the right thing and always know exactly how you feel or exactly how to react to it. You expect him to calm you down when you're yelling or to chase you when you run away. You expect so much that you feel entirely and utterly defeated when something doesn't exactly match up with all your plans. But that's the thing - love isn't a plan. It doesn't have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end of visible finish line to those deeply in it. Love happens and it is so incredibly messy.

the best moments in reading are when
you come across something, a thought, a feeling, a way of looking at
things that you'd thought special, particular to you. & here it is,
set down by someone else, a person you've never met, maybe even
someone long dead. & it's as if a hand has come out & taken
yours.

This goes out to
all the people who have been broken, but have been strong enough to let
go. For the people who have hurt so badly that they felt like they would
never love again, but kept their head up. For those who feel like going
back to their old lover would put all the pieces back where they belong
and everything would fit, but accept the cold hard truth instead. For
the people that learn from their mistakes and never stop moving forward,
even when they take two steps back. For the people that wish loneliness
wasn't a part of them, but put up with it anyhow. For the people that
are okay with taking up all of the room in the bed, even if sometimes it
feels a little empty. For the people who wake up in the morning with no
missed calls, but smile anyway. For the people that periodically miss
the past, but are so much more excited for the future. For the people
that have so much tired to their past relationship, but break those
chains to start fresh. For the people that want to look back so badly,
but focus on the road ahead. For the people that pick up the phone so
tempted to call, but keep their dignity in tact instead. For the people
that never wanted to let go, but had to. For the people that still
believe in love even after all of the hurt their heart has endured. For
all the people that gave up not because they were weak, but because most
time it's better just to let go. We'll get our happy ending someday.

Sometimes you have to
be strong for yourself. You have to know that you're a good person and a
good friend. What's meant to be will end up good and what's not -
won't. Love is worth fighting for, but sometimes you can't be the only
one fighting. At times, people need to fight for you. If they don't, you
just have to move on and realize what you gave them was more than they
were willing to give you. Hopefully, people realize great things when
they come around and don't lose something real. Always fight until you
can't fight anymore, and then be fought for.

Beautiful things come
out of horrible situations. I know for a fact. Out of sadness you get a
new found wisdom on how the world can look with a haze of gray clouds,
how people can be senseless, how you can see the whole universe in a
whole new way. And that may be hard to handle, hard to cope, hard to
accept, but it is so damn beautiful if you really take the chance to
realize. Out of anger, you can feel your heart beat race, with every
beat it is shaking your whole being and not only the heavy steps
you take. It is when you, your whole self and some power is telling you
that you are alive. And that is amazing in every angle. Out of anything
there is something in there that makes it incredible. Something that
makes it shine. Whatever you feel is potent and it is such a blessing to
be able to feel what you feel. You just have to think about it.

Serendipity. Look for something, find something else, and realize that what you've found is more suited to your needs than what you thought you were looking for.

They judge her too quickly. The "party girl" and a "slut" all at the same time. But it's worse, it's not just her peers that judge her, but her teachers, adults, everyone that the teachers see as a girl who comes into class, telling her weekend drunks stories and they assume she can't possibly be a good student, but she's just a "party girl" and the adults that pass her on the streets see a "slut", someone who wears too short of skirts, and too tight shirts, and she can't possibly be a role model in those clothes. But they never wonder whats underneath her make-up and her clothes, they can never see past the crazy party stories, and realize that its all a coverup for a girl that doesn't know what a real smile is. A girl that is afraid of who she is, or who she once was. A girl that is tired of tears and tries anything to play it off to the world that she is happy.

What happened? I used to be the girl who never did this. But somehow, now I'm falling too hard, too fast and I know I'm just setting myself up for another disappointment.

I liked when my fingers were entangled in yours,
and my head was on your chest, listening to your heartbeat.
It made me feel safe, like at that moment, nothing bad could touch me.
I wish I could stay in your arms forever.

I’m afraid that in the end, I’ll just be another girl in your life and you’ll be a guy I will never forget

I want you to make the effort. I want to be sought after, irresistibly. I want to occupy your mind, as you do mine.

Sometimes it feels as though the past is holding me back. I can feel it tugging upon my arms, as I pull away. I'm trying to forget everything about it, and more and more everyday I notice how it's impossible.You can't forget and leave what your past was. The only memories that fade are the bad ones, so all you have to remember is how happy you once were, and no longer are.

I hate how easily I can get over every other guy, but with you it's like I can't even go an hour without thinking of you. I get butterflies when someone says your name and the worst part is that I know you will never feel the same way.

don’t waste tears crying for a guy who doesn’t even deserve to see your smile.

sometimes, i feel like i don't belong where i am and that i have
the wrong people in my life. i get this feeling, like i'm an outsider
even when i'm being included or that i'm always around people
who don't know me at all. then i see you smile at me and i don't
mind being invisible to the rest of the world, i realize i'll always
feel alone without you around.

...i can't shake this feeling....

Having someone fall asleep in your arms
is one of the most gratifying feelings in the world.
That they can feel that secure,
that comfortable around you,
to actually drift off to sleep...
It's impossible to feel more
wanted than that.

Life is about chasing after the things
you truly think are worth it,
even if they don't happen.
I'd rather have nothing
but know I didn't settle for something I didn't want.

What do you do when he stops loving you? Well, you cry a little, and wait for the sun to come up. It always does.
[The Sound of Music]

We are all unkind from time to time. We all do things we desperately wish we could undo. Those regrets just become part of who we are, along with everything else. To spend time trying to change that, well, it’s like chasing clouds.

I’m not always as confident as I seem. There are many nights and many days when all I want is to be held. I love being held. Always. Sometimes I don’t want to talk about what is bothering me. Sometimes I just want a hug. Someone who will let me cry. I like when boys cry in front of me - when people aren’t afraid to show what they’re really feeling. I don’t like when people run from their true feelings because it doesn’t do anyone any good. I wear my heart on my sleeve, but I am not naive. I know what it feels like to be completely broken and I am all too familiar with what it means to be hurt. I know what it’s like to see something funny and not laugh. I’ve been taken advantage of, used, and abused. My feelings have been blatantly disregarded. But I still believe that all people are good at heart. And my trust in people has not diminished. To be completely honest, I hope it never does. Ever

The best things in life take risks.

Risk yourself and throw your heart out on the table.

Be who you are and hope people accept you.

If they don’t, too bad.

Always be real.

Never fake.

Smile when you’re happy and cry when you’re sad.

Never hold emotions inside.

Let yourself risk getting hurt.

Let yourself try something new.

Follow your heart and do what you feel is right,

Not what other people tell you to do.

Fall in love, take a chance, and hope the other person feels the same.

Love is a risk.

It could either bring pleasure or pain, sometimes both.

Life is a gamble, and you never know what it’ll bring.

Live in the moment and don’t dwell on the past.

Find the good in everybody.

Think positive and do positive.

Break the rules and take the risk of getting caught.
Love the life you live

Truth is still absolute. Believe that.

Even when that truth is hard and cold,

& more painful than you've ever imagined.

& even when truth is more cruel than any lie

She’s the self-preserved, pretty-but-doesn’t-know-it kind of girl,

reading her books and daydreaming all day; while he’s the outgoing,

spontaneous, good-looking boy with the most amazing eyes you’ll

ever see. They grew up from two different worlds and he’ll teach her

how to stand up against those who look down on her. She’ll teach

him how to love and how to know the true meaning of jealousy; while

he teaches her the same without noticing it. He’ll teach her how to

shout at the world without a wince because his hand is holding hers

tightly, letting her know he will never leave her; and causing her to

forget her fears and just be able to live for once, without any worries.